A Wedding So Sombre

 It was my brother's wedding. Although I am a supporter of court marriages, my brother always wanted to have a grand function and he was getting married to a girl from West Bengal. So it was going to be a traditional Uttar Pradesh-cum-Bengali wedding ceremony. We were all very excited and the dates and venue was decided.

As we reached Kolkata (my third visit ever), Nibedita (the bride) and her mother were waiting to welcome us. We had almost a trolley full of luggage, so they requested their helpers to assist us in getting the luggage loaded onto the taxis that waited for us outside the railway station.

The drive to the hotel where our stay was arranged was an hour away from the station. Hotel Monotel (http://www.monotel.com/) was situated at Bidhan Nagar in Salt Lake, opposite Indian Institute of Hotel Management and tall building of 'Eco Centre, Ambuja Neotia'. As we checked in, I was overjoyed to find out I had an entire room to myself. This meant I could have my own privacy and carry on with my own activities (mainly the online FTII course which would go on till July 14). 

As we went to their restaurant for lunch I was really excited to find some scrumptious Chinese and Singaporean cuisine there. Post-lunch we rested and went to meet my brother Dhruv, who was down with flu. We made our plans for the next few days uptil the wedding with him, Nibedita and her mother.

In the evening we stepped out for a stroll and dinner at a cafe. I figured Salt Lake was an IT hub with various Chinese companies also having their offices in the vicinity. There were lots of eateries around with people even sipping hot tea/coffee with piping hot pakoras. It felt nostalgic to see yellow taxis still plying the roads.

As we prepared for the big day, we got our act together ahead of Janeu, a traditional sacred thread ceremony so necessary for all Hindu Brahmin boys. By the River Ganga, at a Kali Temple, Dhruv, Mama, Papa and I were present along with two pundits to tie the sacred yellow thread around my brother, Dhruv.

We made a lot of videos and clicked photographs as the Hindu priests chanted mantras and shlokas to make my brother ready for the wedding ceremony for which this sacred thread ceremony is essential. We remembered how our other male cousins- Utkarsh, Shikhar, Manu and Vaibhav had their sacred thread ceremony when they were still young (around 7- 8 years old). 

Almost everyday our lunch and dinner was arranged at Monotel's ground floor restaurant. Soon all other guests arrived and festivities began with much aplomb and fervour. While Sheetal Bhabhi seemed to have great knowledge and interest in rituals, Manu-Kuntal as a 'never-to-part' couple remained quiet and sobre, while Shweta-Nitin always stayed very active, sleeping late and waking up early.

I remained drowned in my FTII Film Appreciation course, occasionally peeping out to find out what's going on. I felt lucky my mother did not drag me into all the wedding festivities, something that didn't interest me much.

As the 'festive' days drew closer, we all decided what we were going to wear and I stacked up my wardrobe with loads of tissues, lipstick, lacto calamine, cleansing milk, nailpaints and Lakme 9-to-5 foundation. 

It was a three-day affair with Haldi on the first day, Aiborobhat on the second day and the Bengali wedding on the third day. I, as the sister of the bridegroom, had to first anoint Dhruv's face with haldi and touch different parts of his body with haldi taken on a leaf. I then took this to the bride's house where her haldi was being held. Aiborobhat was meant to be a bachelor feast for the boy and the girl. All the relatives were invited where the bride/bridegroom was offered a huge plate of food with the fish-head in it. Everyone ate the feast after the bride/bridegroom was fed. Finally came July 10, the wedding day. 

My brother likes vintage cars, so he decided to mount a vintage car to make his grand entry at the wedding venue. As he reached Hotel Tangerine, we were served starters and food while the bride was called to be seated next to him at the mandap. Dhruv was given a 'topor' (white-crowned headgear) to wear throughout the wedding. The bride looked beautiful with a colorful face and a crown like tiara on her head. She was lifted by several of her uncles and moved around the bridegroom. Later they garlanded each other followed by taking the seven rounds around the fire (feras). This was followed by Sindoor and Mangal Sutra ceremonies. Finally at Hotel Monotel there was a ceremony called 'Baashor' (which I missed as it was my bedtime) where the bride's friends spend time knowing the bridegroom's friends/cousins and the night is spent in fun, joy, games and merriment. 

Finally it was time for us to travel back to our hometown, Kanpur along with the bride. While my parents and brother, along with Nibedita were in one compartment, I was in the other compartment with cousins, uncle and aunt (Mama-Mami). I had bought a cake for Utkarsh's birthday celebration in the train. The morning that Nibedita reached the house, there was 'parchhan' (where the bride dips her hands in red-colored water or 'alta' and makes an impression of the full palm on the walls of the house).

On reaching Kanpur, everyone got ready for the celebration there. Reception was on July 15 and before that guests were invited for Katha, pooja and other engagements. At the reception Nibedita sang lovely songs and we all clicked photographs.

I left for Delhi soon after while Nibedita and Dhruv stayed behind to meet and greet other family friends and relatives.